September 26, 2009

Products I've Loved and Mourned

Just like television shows that eventually have to be taken off the air, companies sometimes stop making our favorite products. Below is a list of the ones I still miss:

Chicken and Cheddar Nuggets, I think Banquet brand—I was addicted to these in college. I would literally walk to the store to buy a box with all the change I could scrounge and that was all I’d eat that day, then the next day I’d do it all over again. I still dream of the crunchy-on-the-outside, moist and cheesy-on-the-inside goodness. Sure, I was probably malnourished, but those nuggets had me under some kind of spell. Maybe they took it off the market because one of the ingredients was highly addicting, like Chicken and Crack Nuggets. I’ll never know, but I’m still Jonesing for them.

Flex Shampoo—update! I found some in my local Fred Meyer! Same old bottle, same familiar fragrance! I remember the first time I smelled it. In elementary school, I think the fifth grade, my friend Greer (yes, that was her first name) had the thickest, most enviable hair, and to top it off, it smelled great. I asked her what brand shampoo she used and begged my mom to buy it. It didn’t change the texture of my wispy flaxen locks, but I left a trail of musky scent behind me wherever I went.

Screaming Yellow Zonkers – according to Wikipedia, ConAgra bought out the company that made Zonkers and then discontinued the product in 2007. Whiskey Tango Foxtrot? Not everyone likes peanuts in their sweetened popcorn, ya know!

Lysol Direct—I liked this household cleaner because of the scent, but they discontinued it soon after introducing it. Makes me wonder why. I tried Googling it to make sure my favorite cleaning product wasn’t coating my lungs with some deadly chemical each time I inhaled the clean, musky scent (hm, kinda smelled like Flex, come to think of it), but I didn’t find out why it suddenly disappeared off the shelves. Let’s hope “Lysol Direct Disease” doesn’t start appearing in lungs everywhere!

Mounds—they still make the sweet, dark chocolate, coconutty goodness of a Mounds bar, but the darned thing is hard to find! Sometimes even in the drug store, when facing a wall of candy choices, the Mounds, which was introduced in 1920, is nowhere to be seen. “Sometimes you feel like a nut; sometimes you don’t!” Well, I NEVER feel like a nut in my choice of candy bar. I’ve even been known to pick most of the nuts out of a Snickers bar before eating it, yes, indeedy.

Jimmy Dean frozen omelets—another product that still exists, but is hard to find. I buy these for the picky, picky little eater in the house: my six-year-old son. He’s like me, not a big breakfast eater, but there’s no way he can skip eating before going off to school, so I tempt him with the ham-and-cheesy goodness of these two-minutes-in-the-microwave meals. When I started seeing them with red clearance labels at the local Target, one of the few places I could even find them, I panicked. No way did I want, nor would I be capable of, playing chef that early in the morning, every morning, whipping up omelets for a boy who won’t eat a bowl of cardboard and sugar like every other kid on the block! Luckily, they still have them at Fred Meyer, so I stock up whenever I’m shopping in that neck of the woods.

Sunbelt Chewy Granola Bars, Fudge-dipped Coconut—okay, here’s a slightly healthier version of the Mounds bar that I found recently, just long enough to get addicted and then Bam! Can’t find them anywhere anymore! So, nobody but me loves coconut and everybody but me must have nuts in their candy? Not fair.

What products did you love and then mourn?